A few weeks ago, I was out pushing my mower, rare silence filling my head. The silence didn’t last very long. Thoughts began bouncing around like ping pong balls. Hundreds of them, each representing a fear, worry, or awful reality related to the world we are living in. Tears dropped down my cheeks and suddenly a new thought entered my mind:
Never in my life have I longed for Heaven like I do right now.
I’ve encountered my fair share of struggle, heartache, and tragedy. But even in the middle of the worst of those moments, there was an undeniable desire to remain. Because despite my circumstances, I felt content in my life here on this earth. I felt content to feel the love of my family. I felt content to hope for a better day tomorrow. I felt content to continue in life as I knew it—even if I knew it was hard.
But on that hot afternoon when my tears mixed with my sweat, I suddenly understood what it felt like to long for Heaven. Words from the book of Revelation rolled through my mind:
He will wipe away their tears. . .
never will they hunger . . .
never will they thirst . . .
no more death or mourning . . .
no more curse . . .
He will make all things new . . .
there will be no night . . .
no need for a lamp or sun . . .
because God will be the light.
And all I could think is I want that.
It’s not that I no longer love my family or enjoy my life. It’s that all of a sudden I understand what it means to want God more.
And what if that is part of God’s purpose in all of this? To teach us how to want Him more. To show us that this world is not our home, this life is not the end. To create in our hearts a longing for eternity with Him.
Our country is on fire. Waves are crashing in. Families are divided. Tension is high. People are sick.
And some days many of us feel like it’s all too much. Yet, at the same time, it leaves us feeling like we want more. More love, more peace, more hope, more Jesus.
And that is exactly what we need.
But until the day our Savior returns, I intend to soak up every moment I have on this earth with the beautiful family I’ve been blessed with.
And I will do so with a longing in my heart—a longing for Heaven.